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January 20, 2008

Comments

BrooklynGirl

Oh, that's so hard. Thanks for sharing it.

My parents are visiting now and it's been really hard and I feel like such an ungrateful child around them that it makes me feel like a terrible person.

"We can only move forward."

Indeed.

dorothy

I think the image of you dragging trash across town is an amazing metaphor. I'm glad you don't have to do it.

Pam

Wow. I hope it is a new beginning for you.

Deathstar

What a heart-wrenching post. It really touched my heart. I've seen a little bit about hoarders on talk shows and it's always amazed me how people can live like that, but I also learned that it fills a deep psychological need. The fact that you saw it coming and dreaded it, I can relate a little to it. My mum has dementia and is in a long term care facility near me. She had moved here and all her things had to be put in storage. And it took my years to get around to looking at it. I would break down and be depressed every time I tried. Trying to sort through it all. What to keep, what to throw away. And in every box, there was no organization whatsoever, my sister and I had to go through every little thing because there were bits of "treasure" scattered everywhere. It was absolutely hearbreaking and exhausting. And that was just the things in a storage unit. Frankly, if my husband wasn't there to get really pragmatic about some things, we wouldn't have been able to finish in the time we took.

Be kind to yourself. You might want to hire and/or get some friends to help to get rid of/sort through some of the stuff. You'll save hours and some sanity. You're trying to go through 50 years! You are a good daughter. Even to your father. Your father knows deep in his heart his shortcomings, but he cannot undo them. His suffering is too great. Stand in the truth of who you are. You are very strong.

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